Thanks to my friend Avi Liran in Singapore for sending me this, and an even bigger thank-you to his daughter for drawing it. Artist Savyon-Li Liran will be 11 on Feb 26.

While some people celebrate Valentine’s Day, others celebrate the Chinese New Year — the year of the Tiger! (And no doubt, some people celebrate both!)

Both days fall on Feb 14 this year.

According to Chinese tradition and beliefs, the Tiger is vivid, lively, engaging and lucky — and truly courageous.

Like the tiger, to love and to be loved is vivid, lively, engaging and lucky. And also like the tiger, to truly love and be truly loved, one has to be truly courageous.

Happy Valentines Day. Happy Year of the Tiger.

Essentially yours,

Michel Neray
Chief Differentiation Officer
The Essential Message

Funky jewellery courtesy of Slashpile Designs (www.slashpiledesigns.com)

Dogs may understand marketing far better than we have ever given them credit for. They know, for example, that if they want to establish themselves in a certain territory, they need to leave their scent all over it.

Male dogs generally mark their territory to lay claim to it; female dogs mark their territory to attract a male, (although dominant females may want to lay claim too.)

Either way, it’s marketing 101.

No one will ever buy from you if they have never heard of you.

In the dog-eat-dog competitive world, this may be the most important lesson.

You can’t build a business by keeping who you are and what you do a secret — no matter how great you are, no matter how much you believe in the laws of attraction, and (even) no matter how compelling your Essential Message.

That’s why the most successful among us are constantly marketing — writing articles, giving speeches, attending networking events, sending newsletters… being ‘out there’.

And like a dog’s scent on a fire hydrant, your customers’ memories can be easily painted over by fresher, more recent and possibly more dominant ones. That’s why you have to constantly remind the people in your target market that you are alive and well and open for business.

So what are you doing to mark — I mean ‘market’ – your territory?

Essentially yours,

Michel Neray
Chief Differentiation Officer
The Essential Message

Warning: this may be difficult to accept for traditional marketers.

Of course, everyone knows that all great sales and marketing focuses on the benefits, right? And the higher level the benefit is, the better.

There’s only one problem with that: it’s wrong.

Telling your prospects you’ll help them — insert any high level benefit, like ‘make more money’, ‘increase productivity’, or ‘be a hero in your company’ — is usually as impactful, credible and differentiating as a politician saying he or she supports world peace.

Think about it; doesn’t everyone say that?

Yes, you have to understand how your product or service will lead to great benefits, both rational and emotional, but focusing on those benefits is usually not effective to get people interested in the first place.

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In order to really engage people in conversation about what you do, forget features and benefits. Instead, pay attention to what really engages people in conversation about what you do.

If that sounds simplistic, consider that benefits are all about theory. Using the Essential Message approach, I encourage the people and businesses I work with to use prospects’ reactions and responses to uncover Impact Statements, Persuasion Drivers and Provocative Questions.

Traditional benefits may have been helpful when there were few products and services competing for the same share of wallet. In today’s highly competitive, overcrowded market, Impact Statements are all about what truly works. And, what truly works in getting the other person’s interest may be a seemingly minor detail, a major feature, an advantage, or even, yes, a benefit… but who cares?

Next time you’re talking to a client, prospect or someone at a networking event, throw your usual script in the trash and focus on the person in front of you. What really interests him or her about what you offer? In my experience, what truly interests prospective clients is buried deep down on page 753 of the sales manual as an afterthought. (And in many cases, it’s not there at all!)

Talk. Listen. Ask. Listen. Ask. Listen. Listen. Listen… Then craft your Essential Message around what works!

Essentially yours,

Michel Neray
Chief Differentiation Officer
The Essential Message

The greatest gift you can either give or receive this year is the Gift of You.

To the members of the Essential Message Bull Pen, corporate clients and the broader Essential Message community who have begun the journey to discover their unique differentiation, I applaud you.

To the Certified Essential Message Consoachants who are creating a worldwide movement where more people and more businesses tap into their authentic differentiation — and use it not just to grow their businesses, but also to help our world evolve into a better place, I honour you.

To everyone everywhere, I wish you peace, love and understanding…

Essentially yours,

Michel Neray
Chief Differentiation Officer
The Essential Message

Asking your clients for feedback is always a good practice — but using their feedback to attract new clients may not be.

Let me explain…

When the idea first popped into my head that I might enjoy training in the martial arts, I was attracted to the usual cast of benefits: increased personal confidence, self-defence and fitness. But once I started training, and as my training progressed, I found myself more and more interested in the precise body movement that the training demands.

In fact, rather than thinking of kata (the specific set of karate moves that make up forms) as the less pleasant — albeit necessary — part of my training, it became the primary reason I went back, and continue to go back, to the dojo.

But when I try to explain the satisfaction and enjoyment I get from something as obscure as ‘precise body movement’ to anyone but the uninitiated, what I usually get is a blank stare.

That underscores one of the most important distinctions you must make when understanding your clients’ motivations:

The reasons people first a product or service are often very different from the reasons they stay with it.

Don’t make the mistake of confusing those different motivations in your sales and marketing. When asking your clients for feedback, help them access the hopes, interests, challenges and skepticisms they had before they started working with you.

This way, you ensure that your messaging is relevant and compelling to attract new clients.

Essentially yours,

Michel Neray
Chief Differentiation Officer
The Essential Message